I see that you're a troubled soul
And this breaks me down inside
How you're full of uncertainty
How anxiety keeps you up at night
I see that you're a troubled soul
Always searching for a way
Always looking for the answers
That are right in front of your face
I see that you're a troubled soul
You say this is nothing new
That this always happen
The bad things that happen to you
I see that you're a troubled soul
Always wanting more
And while that's quite alright
How about the things you have?
Those things, do you adore?
I see that you're a troubled soul
I wish I could make your troubles go away
To ease your every worry
To stop all your pain
I see that you're a troubled soul
But this isn't the way things have to be
If you have a little faith
You'll see that I've given you the key
I see that you're a troubled soul
For this, I've given you a part of me
So that you wouldn't be alone
In hopes to give you peace
I see that you're a troubled soul
I wish you wouldn't push me far away
I wish you'd take my hand
That you could understand
Love and faith will guide your way
I see that you're a troubled soul
But I know, this isn't who you are
So when I answer your questions at night
To listen isn't hard
I see that you're a troubled soul
However, like me, this too will fade
In time, you'll see a better life
In time, your soul will change
And when I no longer see your troubled soul
There's just one thing I pray
That the peace that you'll be given
You won't let it slip away
Friday, December 21, 2007
Thursday, December 6, 2007
Sensitivity
Embrace my sensitivity
It doesn't mean that I am weak
Embrace my sensitivity
Just think, it's a reason why we speak
Embrace my sensitivity
It's compassion without fear
It's that little light in a dark, cold room that's there for warmth and to dry your tears
Embrace my sensitivity
But don't ever walk on egg shells with me
Be who you are and do what you do, I'll understand things the way they're intended to be
Embrace my sensitivity
It's part of the best that I have to give
To think if more people were sensitive, the world would be a better place to live
Embrace my sensitivity
Even if it seems like I am hurt
It's only because I care about you and I've given you that worth
See, what some people don't understand about sensitivity; is that it's not always about pain
It's not about a bad word or deed, maybe just a reaction to why things happened a certain way
Sometimes it's putting yourself in other shoes- to better understand
To understand why we laugh and cry, that there's always another chance
So, embrace my sensitivity
Because of it, I call you friend
Embrace my sensitivity
It's part of who and what I am.
-Susan Abascal
It doesn't mean that I am weak
Embrace my sensitivity
Just think, it's a reason why we speak
Embrace my sensitivity
It's compassion without fear
It's that little light in a dark, cold room that's there for warmth and to dry your tears
Embrace my sensitivity
But don't ever walk on egg shells with me
Be who you are and do what you do, I'll understand things the way they're intended to be
Embrace my sensitivity
It's part of the best that I have to give
To think if more people were sensitive, the world would be a better place to live
Embrace my sensitivity
Even if it seems like I am hurt
It's only because I care about you and I've given you that worth
See, what some people don't understand about sensitivity; is that it's not always about pain
It's not about a bad word or deed, maybe just a reaction to why things happened a certain way
Sometimes it's putting yourself in other shoes- to better understand
To understand why we laugh and cry, that there's always another chance
So, embrace my sensitivity
Because of it, I call you friend
Embrace my sensitivity
It's part of who and what I am.
-Susan Abascal
Friday, November 9, 2007
What a real gentleman is!
"This is the final test of a gentleman: his respect for those who can be of no possible value to him."
- William Lyon Phelps
Men wonder why women claim there are no good men left in this world. Their mind tends to lapse in processing what is meant by this. What we're referring to are gentlemen. Granted there might be a few and in respects to the world as a whole- it kind of seems like a handful.
Does anyone even know what a gentleman is?
A well-mannered and considerate man with high standards of proper behavior.
gentleman. (n.d.). The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition.
I think Phelps puts it better though. A man that can respect someone that has no value to him.
See, there are those guys that claim to be gentleman and really aren't. They're the ones that open the door for every pretty lady and maybe even some that aren't. For some reason some men think that that's the extent of their duties as a gentleman. No lie, it is flattering and accomodating. But there still lacks that inner rareity of what a real gentleman is.
I think a selfless man- a gentleman. A man with compassion for humanity. A man that would bestow honesty out of respect, show kindness to someone of lesser stature or more, that would open a door for someone unbias to their gender, generous in any aspect towards anyone-especially those less fortunate. A man that doesn't think of himself any less of a man for saying please and thank you. Not neccessarily a man that holds to traditions, morals and values but one that cultivates and makes his own based on his own sincerity and not so much those of society.
A true gentleman is a rareity. Nevertheless, most women appreciate them and the ones that at least try to be. Maybe it's a woman's part to encourage more of this in men but it just wouldn't be the same if it didn't come from within.
- Susy
- William Lyon Phelps
Men wonder why women claim there are no good men left in this world. Their mind tends to lapse in processing what is meant by this. What we're referring to are gentlemen. Granted there might be a few and in respects to the world as a whole- it kind of seems like a handful.
Does anyone even know what a gentleman is?
A well-mannered and considerate man with high standards of proper behavior.
gentleman. (n.d.). The American Heritage® Dictionary of the English Language, Fourth Edition.
I think Phelps puts it better though. A man that can respect someone that has no value to him.
See, there are those guys that claim to be gentleman and really aren't. They're the ones that open the door for every pretty lady and maybe even some that aren't. For some reason some men think that that's the extent of their duties as a gentleman. No lie, it is flattering and accomodating. But there still lacks that inner rareity of what a real gentleman is.
I think a selfless man- a gentleman. A man with compassion for humanity. A man that would bestow honesty out of respect, show kindness to someone of lesser stature or more, that would open a door for someone unbias to their gender, generous in any aspect towards anyone-especially those less fortunate. A man that doesn't think of himself any less of a man for saying please and thank you. Not neccessarily a man that holds to traditions, morals and values but one that cultivates and makes his own based on his own sincerity and not so much those of society.
A true gentleman is a rareity. Nevertheless, most women appreciate them and the ones that at least try to be. Maybe it's a woman's part to encourage more of this in men but it just wouldn't be the same if it didn't come from within.
- Susy
Wednesday, November 7, 2007
Dad
It's amazing how things are different now
More like sad, to tell the truth
When I sit here and wonder what went wrong
Things aren't the same between me and you
Never in my life could I imagine
That things would be this way
That we would grow so far apart
That we would create this much pain
I used to look to you so much
For various little things
Whether it was your wisdom, hugs, advice or such
Or just the comfort you would bring
I knew that when things got tough
You'd be right there to give me strength
You'd never let me give up
You taught me to have faith
You taught me to be honest, to maintain my dignity
To take pride in all the things I do but mostly to take pride in me
You taught me the difference between right and wrong
The meaning of modesty, compassion and loyalty
For this you were the apple of my eye
My confidant, my father, my security
And yet, everything you once taught
The things that made me who I am today
You've come to contradict each one of them
Except for pride- that's the only thing you maintained
This pride and stubbornness you possess
Is what caused our bond to fade
But it would be ignorant of me
To make you the only one to blame
See I've come to realize
There's no difference when our attitude's the same
This is why things are different now
This is why there's pain
The saddest truth is this
Things will probably never be the same
Yet, I'll hold on to memories
How we'd combat nightmares with late night talks
How we'd roll "monster" cheese with grape jelly
And our random father-daughter walks
I'll still hold on to the things you taught
After all, it made me the woman I am today
Until the day things aren't so different anymore
Dad, I'll still have faith
- Susan Abascal
More like sad, to tell the truth
When I sit here and wonder what went wrong
Things aren't the same between me and you
Never in my life could I imagine
That things would be this way
That we would grow so far apart
That we would create this much pain
I used to look to you so much
For various little things
Whether it was your wisdom, hugs, advice or such
Or just the comfort you would bring
I knew that when things got tough
You'd be right there to give me strength
You'd never let me give up
You taught me to have faith
You taught me to be honest, to maintain my dignity
To take pride in all the things I do but mostly to take pride in me
You taught me the difference between right and wrong
The meaning of modesty, compassion and loyalty
For this you were the apple of my eye
My confidant, my father, my security
And yet, everything you once taught
The things that made me who I am today
You've come to contradict each one of them
Except for pride- that's the only thing you maintained
This pride and stubbornness you possess
Is what caused our bond to fade
But it would be ignorant of me
To make you the only one to blame
See I've come to realize
There's no difference when our attitude's the same
This is why things are different now
This is why there's pain
The saddest truth is this
Things will probably never be the same
Yet, I'll hold on to memories
How we'd combat nightmares with late night talks
How we'd roll "monster" cheese with grape jelly
And our random father-daughter walks
I'll still hold on to the things you taught
After all, it made me the woman I am today
Until the day things aren't so different anymore
Dad, I'll still have faith
- Susan Abascal
ENFJ Personality- Teacher
ENFJ Personality- Teacher
The Portait of the Teacher (ENFJ)
The Idealists called Teachers are abstract in their thought and speech, cooperative in their style of achieving goals, and directive and extraverted in their interpersonal relations. Learning in the young has to be beckoned forth, teased out from its hiding place, or, as suggested by the word "education," it has to be "educed." by an individual with educative capabilities. Such a one is the eNFj, thus rightly called the educative mentor or Teacher for short. The Teacher is especially capable of educing or calling forth those inner potentials each learner possesses. Even as children the Teachers may attract a gathering of other children ready to follow their lead in play or work. And they lead without seeming to do so.
Teachers expect the very best of those around them, and this expectation, usually expressed as enthusiastic encouragement, motivates action in others and the desire to live up to their expectations. Teachers have the charming characteristic of taking for granted that their expectations will be met, their implicit commands obeyed, never doubting that people will want to do what they suggest. And, more often than not, people do, because this type has extraordinary charisma.
The Teachers are found in no more than 2 or 3 percent of the population. They like to have things settled and arranged. They prefer to plan both work and social engagements ahead of time and tend to be absolutely reliable in honoring these commitments. At the same time, Teachers are very much at home in complex situations which require the juggling of much data with little pre-planning. An experienced Teacher group leader can dream up, effortlessly, and almost endlessly, activities for groups to engage in, and stimulating roles for members of the group to play. In some Teachers, inspired by the responsiveness of their students or followers, this can amount to genius which other types find hard to emulate. Such ability to preside without planning reminds us somewhat of an Provider, but the latter acts more as a master of ceremonies than as a leader of groups. Providers are natural hosts and hostesses, making sure that each guest is well looked after at social gatherings, or that the right things are expressed on traditional occasions, such as weddings, funerals, graduations, and the like. In much the same way, Teachers value harmonious human relations about all else, can handle people with charm and concern, and are usually popular wherever they are. But Teachers are not so much social as educational leaders, interested primarily in the personal growth and development of others, and less in attending to their social needs.
Mikhail Gorbachev, Oprah Winfrey, Pope John Paul II, Ralph Nader, John Wooden, and Margaret Mead are examples of Teacher Idealists.
A full description of the Teacher and the Idealists is in People Patterns or Please Understand Me II
Pygmalion Project: The Teacher
excerpted from The Pygmalion Project: The Idealist, by Dr. Stephen Montgomery Copyright © 1989 Stephen Montgomery
The Idealist most committed to guiding others through the doors of life, or along the pathways of learning and understanding, is the type that Keirsey has named the Teacher (Myers's "ENFJ").
Teachers are natural facilitators in all their relationships, encouraging those around them, urging their personal growth, and taking charge of others (particularly of groups) with an extraordinary enthusiasm and confidence. Indeed, Teachers are so expressive and charismatic in their leadership -- in a word, so inspiring -- that they seem in some ways less coercive than the other Idealists. Keirsey says that, though Teachers are both expressive and role-directive, they manage to "command without seeming to do so," not by means of explicit orders, nor through saintly patience, romantic longing, or mute withdrawal, but by kindling in their students and colleagues their own passion for self-exploration and development. Teachers are masters of the art of positive expectation (or "front-loading"), and they communicate their belief in the evolution of the "self" with such a glow of promise that quite often, as Keirsey tells us, their optimism "induces action" in others, and the "desire to live up to [their] expectations."
Teachers bring all this infectious energy to their intimate relationships as well, and they make passionate and delightfully creative companions. However, at such close range the intensity of their wishes for their loved ones can create interpersonal conflict. Teachers can overwhelm their loved ones with their exuberance, and with their Pygmalion presumption that everyone wants to be helped along the path of self-discovery. Then, when their loved ones either resist their pressure or fail to meet their idealistic expectations, Teachers can feel frustrated, disillusioned, or even betrayed by the persons they care most about.
The Portait of the Teacher (ENFJ)
The Idealists called Teachers are abstract in their thought and speech, cooperative in their style of achieving goals, and directive and extraverted in their interpersonal relations. Learning in the young has to be beckoned forth, teased out from its hiding place, or, as suggested by the word "education," it has to be "educed." by an individual with educative capabilities. Such a one is the eNFj, thus rightly called the educative mentor or Teacher for short. The Teacher is especially capable of educing or calling forth those inner potentials each learner possesses. Even as children the Teachers may attract a gathering of other children ready to follow their lead in play or work. And they lead without seeming to do so.
Teachers expect the very best of those around them, and this expectation, usually expressed as enthusiastic encouragement, motivates action in others and the desire to live up to their expectations. Teachers have the charming characteristic of taking for granted that their expectations will be met, their implicit commands obeyed, never doubting that people will want to do what they suggest. And, more often than not, people do, because this type has extraordinary charisma.
The Teachers are found in no more than 2 or 3 percent of the population. They like to have things settled and arranged. They prefer to plan both work and social engagements ahead of time and tend to be absolutely reliable in honoring these commitments. At the same time, Teachers are very much at home in complex situations which require the juggling of much data with little pre-planning. An experienced Teacher group leader can dream up, effortlessly, and almost endlessly, activities for groups to engage in, and stimulating roles for members of the group to play. In some Teachers, inspired by the responsiveness of their students or followers, this can amount to genius which other types find hard to emulate. Such ability to preside without planning reminds us somewhat of an Provider, but the latter acts more as a master of ceremonies than as a leader of groups. Providers are natural hosts and hostesses, making sure that each guest is well looked after at social gatherings, or that the right things are expressed on traditional occasions, such as weddings, funerals, graduations, and the like. In much the same way, Teachers value harmonious human relations about all else, can handle people with charm and concern, and are usually popular wherever they are. But Teachers are not so much social as educational leaders, interested primarily in the personal growth and development of others, and less in attending to their social needs.
Mikhail Gorbachev, Oprah Winfrey, Pope John Paul II, Ralph Nader, John Wooden, and Margaret Mead are examples of Teacher Idealists.
A full description of the Teacher and the Idealists is in People Patterns or Please Understand Me II
Pygmalion Project: The Teacher
excerpted from The Pygmalion Project: The Idealist, by Dr. Stephen Montgomery Copyright © 1989 Stephen Montgomery
The Idealist most committed to guiding others through the doors of life, or along the pathways of learning and understanding, is the type that Keirsey has named the Teacher (Myers's "ENFJ").
Teachers are natural facilitators in all their relationships, encouraging those around them, urging their personal growth, and taking charge of others (particularly of groups) with an extraordinary enthusiasm and confidence. Indeed, Teachers are so expressive and charismatic in their leadership -- in a word, so inspiring -- that they seem in some ways less coercive than the other Idealists. Keirsey says that, though Teachers are both expressive and role-directive, they manage to "command without seeming to do so," not by means of explicit orders, nor through saintly patience, romantic longing, or mute withdrawal, but by kindling in their students and colleagues their own passion for self-exploration and development. Teachers are masters of the art of positive expectation (or "front-loading"), and they communicate their belief in the evolution of the "self" with such a glow of promise that quite often, as Keirsey tells us, their optimism "induces action" in others, and the "desire to live up to [their] expectations."
Teachers bring all this infectious energy to their intimate relationships as well, and they make passionate and delightfully creative companions. However, at such close range the intensity of their wishes for their loved ones can create interpersonal conflict. Teachers can overwhelm their loved ones with their exuberance, and with their Pygmalion presumption that everyone wants to be helped along the path of self-discovery. Then, when their loved ones either resist their pressure or fail to meet their idealistic expectations, Teachers can feel frustrated, disillusioned, or even betrayed by the persons they care most about.
Thursday, October 25, 2007
Opa Locka Saggy Pants Ordinance
The following are my own personal opinions and rationale reflected from a discussion on Power 96's Morning Show regarding Opa Locka's ordinance banning the wearing of saggy pants.
Anyway, I'm all for the ordinance they passed a little disturbed that the mayor was the only one that voted against it because he doesn't want to "legislate morality". I mean, isn't that what we have laws and codes of conduct for? To maintain morality, order and decency. Maybe some people have lost touch with this. Wait... they have.
Then someone mentioned about the right to FREEDOM of EXPRESSION. Yes, we have that right. Yes, we're entitled to it. However, what exactly are people that wear their pants so low trying to express? It shows they don't know how to wear clothes, they're too lazy to wear clothes properly, they're rebelious- "it shows individualism". Individualism is shown when you're different from the majority- in other words, if everyone is wearing their pants off their bottom and you're doing the same- you're no different! Please, expression is through character but being such a distraction hides the person and frankly, I don't know many people that will take such persons seriously.
Lastly, for the ones calling in offended that judgment is passed on persons dressing like such- how they feel that just because a person is wearing pants below their bottom doesn't mean their a bad person. You're absolutely right. Just because you wear saggy pants doesn't mean you're a bad person. However, I am certain that persons that continue to dress like that way past childhood and adolescents- will NOT get far. The way we dress is part of our social identity- how we view ourselves and how others view us. I'm begining to sound redundant. Some actually believe you can get far in life wearing baggy pants- WRONG! Sure some will argue- look at the rappers and the athletes...even with them my point is valid. You won't see P.Diddy or Jay-Z walking into a board meeting with their pants hanging off their bottom. Matter of fact, you rarely see them dressed so sluggishly. This is only to rationalize the hip-hop genre. Look at the rest of the world that isn't in the entertainment industry. Can you imagine the President of the United States representing our country sporting a pair of saggy jeans or the minister/preist of a church conducting sermons in a place of worship with his boxers showing out of his pants? How seriously would you take them?
Actually, that just brought a valid question that might help some... How many people go to church dressed like this? I'm about 90% sure that most wear proper slacks and a tucked in shirt because it would be inappropriate to go into a place of worship dressed like that. Right? So what, are the views of saggy pants now hypocritical?
I just want people to see the good in this ordinance and the potential positive effect it will have on the communities within Opa Locka. While it might not seem as something so important as muggings or other crimes- it's part of the root of the problems with those crimes.
If how you dress is part of who you are as a person- then you're attitude and choices in life are reflected by it as well. If a person dresses decently then there are less chances of that person acting indecently. That's why role model and dress for success programs are implemented in a lot of schools- psychological influencing to be something better. Granted there are criminals in 3-piece suits but those criminals are apart of more white collar crimes. They aren't the types of criminals stealing cars, breaking into houses, mugging people or the other types of petty crimes that conflict Opa Locka.
Anyway, I have to stop somewhere. I hope this made some sense and that people can actually give it some credit. There's always a root of a problem- whehter some would like to believe it or not- this is a really good place to start. There's nothing wrong with looking respectable and decent. I bet if some tried- they'd actually might like themselves better and eventually develop a better outlook on life.
Thanks for taking the time to read this!
Anyway, I'm all for the ordinance they passed a little disturbed that the mayor was the only one that voted against it because he doesn't want to "legislate morality". I mean, isn't that what we have laws and codes of conduct for? To maintain morality, order and decency. Maybe some people have lost touch with this. Wait... they have.
Then someone mentioned about the right to FREEDOM of EXPRESSION. Yes, we have that right. Yes, we're entitled to it. However, what exactly are people that wear their pants so low trying to express? It shows they don't know how to wear clothes, they're too lazy to wear clothes properly, they're rebelious- "it shows individualism". Individualism is shown when you're different from the majority- in other words, if everyone is wearing their pants off their bottom and you're doing the same- you're no different! Please, expression is through character but being such a distraction hides the person and frankly, I don't know many people that will take such persons seriously.
Lastly, for the ones calling in offended that judgment is passed on persons dressing like such- how they feel that just because a person is wearing pants below their bottom doesn't mean their a bad person. You're absolutely right. Just because you wear saggy pants doesn't mean you're a bad person. However, I am certain that persons that continue to dress like that way past childhood and adolescents- will NOT get far. The way we dress is part of our social identity- how we view ourselves and how others view us. I'm begining to sound redundant. Some actually believe you can get far in life wearing baggy pants- WRONG! Sure some will argue- look at the rappers and the athletes...even with them my point is valid. You won't see P.Diddy or Jay-Z walking into a board meeting with their pants hanging off their bottom. Matter of fact, you rarely see them dressed so sluggishly. This is only to rationalize the hip-hop genre. Look at the rest of the world that isn't in the entertainment industry. Can you imagine the President of the United States representing our country sporting a pair of saggy jeans or the minister/preist of a church conducting sermons in a place of worship with his boxers showing out of his pants? How seriously would you take them?
Actually, that just brought a valid question that might help some... How many people go to church dressed like this? I'm about 90% sure that most wear proper slacks and a tucked in shirt because it would be inappropriate to go into a place of worship dressed like that. Right? So what, are the views of saggy pants now hypocritical?
I just want people to see the good in this ordinance and the potential positive effect it will have on the communities within Opa Locka. While it might not seem as something so important as muggings or other crimes- it's part of the root of the problems with those crimes.
If how you dress is part of who you are as a person- then you're attitude and choices in life are reflected by it as well. If a person dresses decently then there are less chances of that person acting indecently. That's why role model and dress for success programs are implemented in a lot of schools- psychological influencing to be something better. Granted there are criminals in 3-piece suits but those criminals are apart of more white collar crimes. They aren't the types of criminals stealing cars, breaking into houses, mugging people or the other types of petty crimes that conflict Opa Locka.
Anyway, I have to stop somewhere. I hope this made some sense and that people can actually give it some credit. There's always a root of a problem- whehter some would like to believe it or not- this is a really good place to start. There's nothing wrong with looking respectable and decent. I bet if some tried- they'd actually might like themselves better and eventually develop a better outlook on life.
Thanks for taking the time to read this!
A Little Cynicism
It's been said that one of the best forms of communication are by experiences and feelings, mostly because they lack a descriminative bias from others. They are something evoked within us, something true and although its truth could even be debated think of it this way, could someone make you love something you didn't? And, can someone tell you otherwise about something you already lived?
As I was doing some recreational reading (something I usually tend to stir away from) I came across a verse that just grabbed me.
"Feeling is the language of the soul. If you want to know what's true for you about something, look to how you're feeling about it. Feelings are sometimes difficult to discover- and often even more difficult to acknowledge. Yet hidden in your deepest feelings is your highest truth."
I think I may have read this through and through- it only left me to wonder if this were the case with both bad and good feelings. You know, the feelings that give inspiration, hope, joy and happiness. Also the feelings that bring negativity, uncertainty and sadness.
How much truth can we find in them? What if how we feel about something doesn't coincide with the reality of it? Or if something for just a moment something produced such an innocent and sweet feeling and the next just the opposite- which one tells the truth?
Is it this very thing that I'm pondering- the cause for people not to trust in their feelings? Right now I feel like such a person which is the very contradiction of who I am. This leads me to the other form of communication- experiences.
I don't know how many times I've heard or read how our experiences teach us, how they help us grow and how they're such fundamental tools in learning- yet at this very moment I question if I learned the right things from mine. Especially if my experiences seem to carry a repetitious familiarity. It begins to feel like deja vu.
I've heard that "your experience and feelings about a thing represent what you factually and intuitively know about that thing." For the most part I've believed this as my own for a long time. I've trusted in my intuition and even more myself.
Yet my preaching of honesty, vulnerability and trust within the self has got me nowhere except here...
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