A rant- sadness in lies...

I don't understand why people do the things they do. I guess to some extent, we as humans, aren't supposed to understand everything. However, some things just overwhelmingly perplex me. It's sad and frustrating.

I've always believed myself to be an understanding, accepting and forgiving person. I believe myself to be more than fair in most situations and I rarely ever get mad at anyone or anything. I won't say that I don't get upset because I certainly do and I can't help that because I'm just one of those sensitive people in the world. Well, atleast to those I've let close enough in my life to be able to call friends- family of course too.

I've come to experience a lot of awful things in this very short time I've been given to call my LIFE. Don't get me wrong, I've also experienced some of the most beautiful things in life that so many people would wish to know. Yet, in those awful things, I've come to learn and grow as a person. I've learned to forgive those that have hurt me, that have stolen from me, cheated me and walked out of my life. I've even come to accept people opinions and objections, circumstances and misfortunes.

The one thing though that I could never understand or grasp in the slightest is a persons relentless ignorance in their conviction to lie to me. For most people know that I seldom pass any judgment and I'm more than understanding and accepting of most situations/ideas/actions.

It's the worst thing to do to me. It's a disrespect to any person. How can you put value in a person that can't speak the truth or at least admit to the truth in order to maintain their dignity and respect? The thing is you can't.

It's such an awful thing to lose any respect, belief, admiration, faith, trust- an entire perception of/in a person. It's never the lie a person tells- people can see right through those things. It's just the matter of a person telling a lie.

In a Moment

Somewhere along the way
I seemed to realize
Somehow I lost my faith

It's like I looked up
And it all was gone
Just like that
In a moment

It became an overwhelming emptiness
A sophicating void
Once again, I was lost

Nothing to hold
Nothing to cling to

The world I built
Its comfort
Its love
Its tenderness
Its security

All too sudden
Was non-existent

I am alone
Not a familiar face in sight

Just a lie
Just betrayal
Numb

How can this be?

A thousand shattered pieces
And no glue

I sit dazed
Anticipating the comfort of denial
Not even that is present

What I would give right now
For some peace
To breathe
For an explanation
Something to guide me

An ounce of familiarity
My sanity

No
There's nothing
It's gone

Lost
Just like that
In a moment

Food for Thought- 1/22/08

"The colossal misunderstanding of our time is the assumption that insight will work with people who are unmotivated to change. Communication does not depend on syntax, or eloquence, or rhetoric, or articulation but on the emotional context in which the message is being heard. People can only hear you when they are moving toward you, and they are not likely to when your words are pursuing them. Even the choices words lose their power when they are used to overpower. Attitudes are the real figures of speech." - Edwin H. Friedman

It becomes exhausting to try and tell people things intended for their benefit and them not wanting to have any part of it.

When do we decide to listen to the things people are trying to tell us or see the things people are trying show? For those of us trying to share something or give a little part of us, when do we know when to just stop? To just let go, because nothing said or done, at that present moment will make any difference or carry any influence.

We are here to help each other learn, grow and experience life. We're not here to make each other to do these things. We can only do so much to participate and encourage movement towards them and when efforts seem to become exhausted, it's time to just sit back and watch trial and error take it's place.

Acknowledgement and acceptance of all facets of life are essential.

Have a good day!

Sweet Little Girl

Sweet little girl
Don't be afraid
No more harm will come your way

I hate to hear you cry at night
Your little mind
Confused
In fright

Just go to bed
Close your eyes
I know you don't want
Mommy and daddy to hear you cry

Sweet little girl
Don't be afraid
No more harm will come your way

The Monster is gone
It's far away

You can sleep tonight
Tonight you'll be safe

Sweet little girl
Why do you cry?
Please go to bed
Close your eyes

The Monster is gone
There's nothing to fear
Why can't you fall asleep my dear?

Sweet little girl
Don't be afraid
I keep telling you
No more harm will come your way

I'm sorry sweet child
I didn't understand
When you close your eyes
You see that Monster again

But sweet little girl
It's only a dream
Just pray to GOD for prettier things

It's easy sweet child
Just repeat
"And now I lay me down to sleep..."

Sweet little girl
Don't be afraid
I promise
No more harm will come your way

Please stop crying
I know you're confused
I know you're in pain
But if you don't stop
You'll go insane

Sweet little girl
The Monster is gone
I wish we could undo
What that Monster has done

Now come along and follow me
Put those memories in a box
Together-
We'll throw away the key

We'll bury it deep
In the abyss of your soul
Things will get better
As time takes its toll

Sweet little girl
Don't be afraid
No more harm will come your way

I pray you get some rest tonight
Mommy and daddy have tucked you in
Just right

No more tears
Sleep in peace
GOD, please give her
The sweetest dreams